Summer. For special needs families it's not just a season of humidity but a season of humility. God always uses summer to once again reiterate how much I need Him every second of every day to walk this journey out. I'm slowly learning to embrace this season because I know God is working in me, but it is hard. I know of several other special moms that are in the same boat as me ... more than one child with a disability. This makes it nearly impossible to get out of the house and go places. Imagine going to the park (or anywhere else) with two children that at any moment could take off in opposite directions. How do you split yourself in half to chase after them? It's very difficult. So unless a friend or family member or dad is available you are stuck at home, and the longer the summer goes on the more the walls around you seem to cave in. The kids can feel it too. Other than assimilating to a new schedule, they are excited to get out of the house and go back to school. And let's be honest, so am I. However, this doesn't mean I don't love my kids or that we didn't make some fun memories over the summer.
Without a doubt the highlight of our summer the past two years has been the week we spent in Alabama at Joni and Friends Family Retreat (JAF). JAF is a Christian camp for families who have been affected by disabilities. It's founder is Joni Eareckson Tada who herself became a quadriplegic as a teenager. From the moment you arrive you are embraced as family. Your special children are assigned STMs (Short Term Missions), and your typical children are assigned a buddy. These incredible people are there to help all week long with your children enabling you to do things you normally couldn't do. What a blessing!
The other blessing comes in being connected to other moms and dads of special needs children. It was in one of these group meetings toward the end of the week that we shared what this experience had meant to us. This meeting with just women can turn from laughter, to crying, to a hearty AMEN! at any moment. It was in this meeting where I got the chance to share my heart, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to share with you as well.
Many times through the years people have told me how inspired they are by me. How touched they are by my family and it's very untypical challenges. I have always very politely thanked people but have never really understood what they are talking about. I mean honestly, there are days where I don't even feel inspired to get a shower, and my family's unique challenges many times inspire me to take a nap! But what I've come to learn through my time at JAF is that God's grace is very different depending on whether you are dealing with a disability or observing others who are dealing with a disability. As we are usually the family on display, I don't see what others see. However my time at JAF has given me many opportunities to be the observer, and what I've seen is truly a remarkable thing. It's given me the vantage point of others who see me and my family, and it is inspiring. Watching the grace of God flow into a mom dealing with a child in full blown meltdown mode. Watching the grace of God flow from several adults helping a physically disabled adult transfer from a wheel chair into an inner tube at the pool. Watching the grace of God flow from STMs to kids who won't enter the cafeteria because of sensory issues. Watching the grace of God flow from one person with a disability to another person with a disability. Watching the grace of God flow as an adult with Autism helps moms and dads understand their non-verbal child with Autism. Or how about finding out that STMs and buddies are not only volunteers, they pay their own way to be there to help your family? Or how about learning that a buddy assigned to your family has just been through their own personal tragedy six weeks ago and still grieving but is there to serve you? Grace on full display.
You cannot help but be changed and transformed after being in such an environment for a week. It is truly the most beautiful picture of the Body of Christ in motion, and what you eventually learn is that everyone, even and especially those with disabilities, plays a part. What you eventually realize is that we all have limitations and need each other. What you eventually see is how God's strength is displayed through one member of the Body in the area that another member is weak. We are kidding ourselves when we think we don't need each other. And I think this might just be the greatest blessing in being part of the handicapped community ... and that's that we get this concept. We know isolation well and because of that we embrace interdependence. Arms can function but they function better with an elbow, a shoulder, a hand, and fingers and thumbs. You see what I mean?
After this experience I have such a different perspective on being the family on display in public. (Not that I enjoy it any better). But I now realize that someone needs to see this. Someone needs to witness the grace of God that so evidently flows in a difficult situation. However, the truth is this. If you are a member of the Body of Christ you are on display also. In your home. Outside of your home. At work. At school. To your neighbors, family, and community. You are a member of God's family on display.
In my very short career in retail many moons ago, I remember one thing about setting up a window display. It's got to catch people's attention. It's got to draw the eye. It's got to make people want it. You see where I'm going with this, I'm sure. What about you and the way you live your life draws people's attention? What catches their eye? Do they see such a difference between themselves and you that they want what you have?
1 Peter 2:9 says this "But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. A peculiar people (I LOVE that part!) that should DISPLAY the perfection of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light."
My fellow Believers, we are not called to look like the world. We are in this world but not of it. We deal with the same problems as many other people, but we should not be dealing with them the same way. His light within us should be catching people's attention, drawing the eye upward, and making people realize they want Jesus. They NEED Jesus! We live in a lost, confused, dying world, and the only part of you that you should focus on giving away, both in word and in deed, is Him because it's the only thing that matters. It's the only thing that's going to make a lasting impact to that waitress who served you coffee, that mechanic that fixed your car, that neighbor that just found out their spouse is leaving them, that friend whose loved one has just been diagnosed with a terminal illness.
Let's get off the sidelines! Let's get in the race! Let's make a real difference in real lives that have real problems! Let's vow to be open and honest with others about our own struggles and the amazing grace we have received through Christ because of and in spite of them. Let's give them the very best that we can offer of ourselves. Let's give them Jesus ..."The mystery of which was hidden for ages and generations, but is now revealed to His saints ... which is Christ within and among you, the Hope of realizing the glory." (Col. 1:26-27).
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